Tuesday Funny

Canadian Gold

There is a sense of urgency in Canada.  After not winning a gold medal in either of the last two Olympics hosted in Canada, the pressure is on.  I can understand the pride that comes with winning a gold medal for both the athletes and citizens of the home country, and I hope they are successful.

For what its worth, even if Olympic gold remains out of Canada's grasp, I believe Canada achieved the gold comedy many years ago.  For those too young to remember, SCTV was a show about a fictitious television station.  The show included (alphabetically by last name) John Candy, Joe Flaherty, Eugene Levy, Andrea Martin, Rick Moranis, Catherine O'Hara, Martin Short, and Dave Thomas.

Enjoy!

He Looks Like an Owl

I got tipped off to this over at The Fox Nation.

Larry King apparently asked New York Governor Patterson: "The fact that you’ve been, not a pun intended, blind to this. In other words, people have to read the headlines to you, right?”

I imagine being blind would make it more difficult to read. I'm just doing your basic assumption on that one.

Cheap Shot

In a report about Bill Clinton's recent heart troubles, former DNC Chairmen Terry McAuliffe said: "If I know Bill Clinton, he'll be raring to go in about 35 minutes."

About eight nurses confirmed that the former President was indeed raring after about 35 minutes.

I'll be here all week! Tip your waitresses!

Deana Reana Ding-Dong

I'm not too certain what exactly that title means, but I do know that the world would be a much saner place if Howard Dean would simply stop talking!



Don't believe in science? A comment like that is so ridiculous, so serious and unlaced with any sarcasm, that it becomes thoroughly unnecessary by way of its absuridity. NOTE: I tried making that sentece as long and convoluted as possible in order to make it seem like it meant something even though it really means nothing at all.

You know, like a Democrat would.

Of course Republicans and Conservatives believe in science! Apparently we are the only ones, however, that understand science to be comprised of theories, hypothesis...in a word, educated GUESSwork. Why do you think medical professions have "practices?" Because they are constantly refining their work as the science changes, as they discover what works and what doesn't, which assumptions are true and which are not.

I remember being with my wife at The Field Museum in Chicago not so long ago, and they had this huge timeline covering the estimated history of the Earth. Amongst other things, it was shown that scientists believe the Earth to have had around six so-called "Ice Ages" in its history.

Six. The scientists also were nearly unanimous - nearly - in their doubt that the Earth's first, primitive organisms were not driving H2's.

I do not entirely discount the theory of Global Warming. I do believe, however, that there are many other political and profit driven forces at play that necessitate people fear the coming, stormy apocalypse. Read Michael Crichton's State of Fear to get a sense of what I'm talking about.

In the global sense - pun intended - I think what unnerves me the most on the left is what seems to be a complete absense of believing there could ever be something greater at play than the forces of humanity. Let's say that global warming is real and bad things are coming - what makes us think we can stop it? Moreover, what makes us so confident that we all the sole instigators?

If there have already been half a dozen Ice Ages, all before man even existed, perhaps another IS coming. And perhaps it was all part of the plan when man was still a glimmer in God's eye, and not even Al Gore can save us now.

Pay Attention and Take Action

"Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain!"  So goes the line from my favorite scene from The Wizard of Oz.  I am tempted to update the line to, "Pay no attention to the man behind the teleprompter!"  However, that is something that no American can completely afford... literally.

I highly recommend the recent WSJ article by Fouad Ajami, "The Obama Spell Is Broken".  Ajami recounts how Obama was taken in by his own mystique, and essentially believed his election was a mandate for implementing sweeping progressive change.  Ajami suggests what many of us have been onto for some time, including:

The economic stimulus, ObamaCare, the large deficits, the bailout package for the automobile industry—these, and so much more, were nothing short of a fundamental assault on the givens of the American social compact.

We don't have in this republic the technocratic model of the European states, where a bureaucratic elite disposes of public policy with scant regard for the popular will.

It was the way in Paris and Berlin (not to forget Oslo of course) of rebuking all that played out in America since 9/11—the vigilance, the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq, the sense that America's interests and ways were threatened by a vengeful Islamism. But while the Europeans and Muslim crowds hailed him, they damned his country all the same. For his part, Mr. Obama played along, and in Ankara, Cairo, Paris and Berlin he offered penance aplenty for American ways.

 But the curtain has now parted.  Scott Brown was elected in Massachusetts, in a victory that no participant in this republic should ignore.  A veteran with three decades of military service taking over Ted Kennedy's seat, somebody slap me.

However, all is still not well.  The Right Truth blog has a great post that should serve as a wake up call to everyone seeking to make Scott Brown type changes in their elected leadership.  The post points out that the GOP handed Obama some great talking points for all his true believers in their recent Q&A session.  However, I particularly like the snippets attributed to Paul E. Vallely MG, US Army (Ret).  Vallely focuses on a "constitutionalist" approach, and urges:

We cannot permit the current leaders in the White House and Halls of Congress to continue in their efforts to lead us down the road of Progressive Socialism. This is the current battle we Constitutionalists face and we must be aggressive in our efforts. Notice, I have eliminated the terms of liberal…conservative…left and right, as they have little meaning in today’s battle for our Country. Incompetence of officials now come into play as relates to our National Security and Economy and is the rationale for resignations.

I have been thinking that this really is the lesson that should have been learned via the Scott Brown election.  Massachusetts registered Republicans made up approximately 12% of the potential electorate compared to about 3 times that many registered Democrats.  Brown won the election 59% to 41%, because of independents and third party voters.

We all need to take a hard look at our elected officials in Washington.  Business as usual is not working and never will.  If your Congressperson or Senator is part of the problem, be part of the solution.  Pull back the curtain and listen to what the man behind the teleprompter is saying.  To borrow a phrase, Yes We Can... Take It Back Again.

Bow to your Sensei!

Just keeping count here...

Once before the King of Saudi Arabia:

Again before the Japanese Emperor:

Now before the Mayor of Tampa, FL:

Am I missing any?

The Road to Hell...

...is paved with good intentions (e.g. New Years resolutions).  One of mine was to regularly post on the ol' blog, but with one month of 2010 gone by I'm fearing for my immortal soul. 

What I'm even more afraid of is the $3.8 trillion budget, including $1.3 billion in deficit spending, that Comrade Obamavich provided to Congress today. What really puckered the old anatomy was the following:

The Senate moved last week to extend the nation's debt limit to $14.3 trillion to accommodate the projected gap for the current spending year, which ends Sept. 30, but with another $1.3 trillion hole next year, the nation's debt could reach $15.6 trillion by Oct. 1, 2011. That would surpass the nation's annual gross domestic product.

It doesn't take a genius to figure out that things are going to get much worse, and may never get better.  Who can America get to bail us out when we go bankrupt?  I have a few ideas, but I don't like any of them.

The old road to Hades is getting a little crowded, and I can't say I like my company much.